Goodbyes aren’t easy, especially when you have been spending a long time with a person, when you have got some kind of bond in between you guys. I ain’t talking of just love. It may be any kind of relationship! It may be friendship, romantic love, love between a mom and her child, love between siblings etc. There are so many kinds of bonds persisting simultaneously in this world. Moreover, a single person can fulfill multiple bonds. A woman can be a mom, someone’s wife, another’s sister, somebody’s daughter etc. How amazing is that!
My questions today are, why are some bonds tough to let go? Why do our minds keep on reminding us of good memories, those bonds had accomplished once? When does it becomes too impossible to break certain bonds even if you know it’s destroying you?
I thought a lot about that today cause it’s time for me to let go of a few existing bonds! Now suppose you are standing on the roadside, lots of people around. A passerby simply passes you. Would you feel bad for it? Would you even remember the encounter? Would you go home and think of reviving the bond which lasted for just a few seconds? For most people, the answer would be “NO”. But why? That might be because your meeting with the person was highly short lived. He did nothing good or bad enough for your brain to remember him! But if it would have been a person you know, would it be easy to bid a goodbye? Maybe NOT!
Spending time with a person makes our mind perceive the person as belonging to “US”, for example you say, “my” mother, “my” boyfriend, “my” sister, “my” uncle. And it isn’t easy for human brains to let go of something that has a “my” attached to it. I cannot easily let go of “my” dresses but it wouldn’t bother me the least if they were “yours”!
People come into our lives. After spending a few months time with them, our brains give them a tag of “my”. But not everybody can sustain the tag. A “my” has many conditions to it. The person should be taking care of me, should be respecting me, should be accepting me etc. These conditions vary from person to person. After spending a long time with somebody, their showing colours begin to fade away and they finally reveal their true ones! These colours, when do not match with our conditions, the “my” tag slowly begins to fade away! And guess what, when there’s no “my”, the person stays nothing more than a “passerby”. Our brain feels no pain in bidding them AN EASY GOODBYE…